Heaven Knows Your Miserable Now

by Dylan Ewen

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Dylan Ewen: Rhythm Guitar, Vocals
Matt Politoski: Acoustic/Lead Guitar, Backup Vocals
Sai Boddupalli: Bass
Chris Geller: Drums

Recorded and Mixed by Matt Politoski
Mastered by Zach Weeks / www.zachweeks.net
Cover art by Tom Dauer / www.jumptomjump.com

Thank you Mike Nevin for providing the transportation that made this possible. You are a true friend.


released 24 March 2015



all rights reserved


feeds for this album, this artist
Track Name: Souvenir
I wanna kill myself but I'm scared cause I'm a pussy
Talk about it in my head but I could never do it
What the fucks good do you wanna get fucked up
Lay on the couch and complain about your break up

Sitting on the steps you said you felt really sick
Funny cause your silence just made me feel like shit
Why don't you want to fuck me every once in a while
I tell you that and you treat me like fucking a child

Sometimes I think I'm sick but everybody says that
Feels kind of tacky to think about it
As a problem and not just a feeling
Still I can't seem to shake these thoughts of suicide and heavy breathing

You seemed a lot happier this time last year
Now everything you say just seems a bit insincere
I got a picture of you smiling hanging on my wall
Like a souvenir
Track Name: Matchbox 20
I'm finding lots of time to read books and be depressed
The two go hand in hand and there's nothing better than
Listening to Basement and feeling sorry for yourself
I know I'm a piece of shit, how could you tell?

I'm finding lots of time to let my life go by
Watch it as it goes without a regret or a reply
I feel the same way now I did as a kid
Crying every Sunday cause I was already sick of this shit

I got a tattoo and the guy made a mistake
Now I have anxiety about the extra line he made
I wish I liked to get shit faced with my friends
I wish my mom wasn't ashamed of my band

I wish I didn't fuck up and give into my weakness
Put my guard down for a fucking therapist
I wish I knew for sure if I'm for real or just a prick
And I wish that people would realize that Matchbox 20 is fucking sick
Track Name: I Still Complain
I hate everyone including myself
I wanna jump off a building and make it look like I fell
But I can't do that cause I can't stomach myself
Dead, full of shit, mangled and stuck to the ground

I wish I had a chance to forget all of my regret
Wipe my memory clean and just fucking erase it
Losing myself in an endless string of cliches
I'm no longer afraid to die cause the world's a terrible place

Everyone seems to have an answer to my problem today
Find god, do drugs, work out, but it's all the same
Everything's a major distraction or a minor escape
Despite this realization, I still complain

I feel like god abandoned me or like I'm brain dead
Like I made up this sadness cause I have a safety net
I know there's injustice I refuse to acknowledge
Fully aware I turn away from the problem

Suffocated by this empty sense
That all I do doesn't mean shit
Moment after moment dunk me in ice water
I feel so tired
But that's just how it is

I used to think that sleep could solve my problems
That I would feel better if I could just stay unconscious
Now the nights are too short and my days are so long
I'm getting used to my room feeling like a coffin

I'm a fuck face I wish you'd rip off my fucking face
Feed it to stray dogs, forget my fucking name
I want to be dismembered so you can't remember
What my expression looks like after all this shame